Your Child Will Learn
How to communicate their needs to others
Here’s What to Do
- Talk about times when you want to use a strong, respectful voice:
- When someone treats you in a mean or unsafe way
- When someone treats your body in a way you don’t like
- When you need or want something
- Share some examples, and tell your child how they might respond.
- Ask your child to repeat your response, and practice saying it in a strong and respectful voice. Some example phrases:
- “Please stop that!”
- “I don’t like it when…”
- “No thank you, I don’t like that.”
- As it comes up in real life, encourage your child to speak up for themselves in a safe, respectful way.
Put PEER Into Action
PAUSE
- Facing your child, slowly move their arms up to the sky and back down. Let them do the same to you.
ENGAGE
- “Pretend that a friend is tickling you and you don’t want to be tickled. You could say ‘I don’t like that, please stop.’ Can you practice saying it in a strong, respectful voice? Say, ‘I don’t like that, please stop.’”
- “It’s okay to tell people you don’t like something, even me. Can you try looking in my eyes and saying, “No thank you, Mommy. I don’t want a hug right now.”
ENCOURAGE
- “Hmmm… you’re saying the right thing, but you’re saying it in a yelling way. Can you try saying it more respectfully, so that your friend might want to listen more?”
- In a moment of conflict, remind your child: “How can you share what you need or want?”
REFLECT
- How do your friends or siblings act when you yell back at them? How do they act when you use a calm, respectful voice? What do you like better?
Not Quite Ready
Model these conversations with dolls or stuffed animals for your child.
Ready for More
Play “Please give it back.” Set 3 toys on the table, and tell your child to watch as you take away 1 and hide it. Ask them to say “You took away my ___, please give it back” in a strong, respectful voice.
As Your Child Masters This Skill
They will become more comfortable expressing wants and needs in an effective way.
Time to Complete
10 minutes
Materials Needed
None